"...if this scene were a parish you'd all be condemned..."







Last night, while on my break from work, I drove to the Starbucks in Bossier. I ordered myself a Mocha Frappuccino® (double blended of course). I took my oh so yummy beverage and had a seat in one of the oh so comfortable chairs. Upon taking a look around the room, I noticed that there were two couples (couples, as in a man and woman together, not necessarily an item tho). I am not one for listening in on peoples conversations, but it is hard to help when you are by yourself and you can easily hear someone else in the room. I could tell that the one couple had obviously just recently met, or at least just now decided to take the time to get to know each other. She was telling him about her family and home life etc etc etc. What was the other couple talking about you might ask yourself. Well, I really don't know. They were on the other side of the room. Now I bet you are wondering why I told this seemingly pointless story. These were people, not needing anything but another person to talk to. No tv. No radio. No video games. No movie theatre. Nothing but themselves, sitting with a drink (non alcoholic that is), talking. Why does it seem so hard to find people who can actually do that now a days. How nice it must be to have someone you can just sit and carry on an intelligent conversation with. By intelligent conversation, I don't mean discussing how drunk they got the night before or the crazy party they went to the weekend before. Sorry, you might think that is intelligent, I just find it ignorant. Once again, another endangered species in this town, someone who can actually do that.



(end previous thought, begin new)



Everyone seems to be back on the trend of filling out surveys on Xanga and MySpace again. Two of the constant questions I notice are, "Have you ever said 'I love you' and actually meant it?" and "Have you ever been in love?" I started to sit and think of these two questions.

Hmmm. "I love you." Three simple words. Three simple words that I totally hate people just tossing around like they mean nothing. Three simple words that I hate hearing from someone and knowing they are just using it is a generic goodbye of sorts. Three simple words that I try my very best to never say unless I really mean it. So I sat and I thought about those words. I realized that I can easily name someone that I have said that to many a time lately and truly meant it. I think about that and I come to the conclusion that yes, I have said it, yes, I have meant it, and yes I feel that personally, I truly have come to the realization of what those three little words mean.

Now, to be "in love," that is a totally different thing all together. I think that you can love someone with all of your heart, but not be "in love." Maybe everyone who reads this will disagree, probably many, maybe not. To me, to be "in love" seems to be more of a mutual thing. I don't see how you can be "in love" with someone who does not feel the same way about you. Maybe obsessed, confused, but not "in love." To be in love would be where both people have that extreme love for each other and are both willing to do whatever it takes for that love to live on between the two of them. To do whatever it takes to make each other happy. Whatever to be together. That to me, is truly being "in love." Basically being able to completely show and give that love that you have for the person and receiving the same thing in return. Someone may comment me and say "I completely loved _____ and know I was in love, yet they did not feel the same way." I will straight up say I don't believe you. Puppy love. Temporary infatuation. Whatever. Yes, I do think that this love can die. People change, and that changes how people feel. People do totally stupid things that can also change how things are. Totally opinion. But because this is my opinion, of course I think it is true. But hey, I can not say that I have ever been "in love," so maybe someday when I can actually say that I will change my opinion of this entire thing.



(end previous thought, begin new)



A lady at work said I was in her dream last night . . . . crying.





"an absence of pain is not pleasure"

<X3